Exercising Without Compromising Energy
Last updated: February 2020
Well, I did it! Months ago. I went for 3, 2.2-mile runs that took approximately 18 minutes each in a week. And it took me 3 weeks to recover. And a cold tried to take over in those 3 weeks, too. That might have been because it was circulating or because I was exhausted from the running and my immune system was weak because of it. And I haven't been running again since.
Wanting to exercise but wanting energy
This is partly because of having the dog living with me whilst his owner has a broken ankle that's mending. It's also partly because I don't want to go running again and have it have the same impact that it did when I tried it earlier in the year. I don't want to be exhausted from it. I don't want to know that it really is the running that exhausts me and that I shouldn't do it. So, I prefer denial at this stage and just don't go.
I miss it. I want to do it. But I also don’t want to compromise my health and energy levels by doing it. Especially as my work is so much busier now and I have the dog to walk. If I run and have no energy, I won't be able to look after him properly. So it’s a bit of a mental battle.
London is full of runners. And I watch them go past and think, "I wish I could do that." And the problem with London being full of runners is that I think this at least once a day. I suppose if I *really* wanted to go running, I would. But as I’m not marathon training, I won’t destroy myself just to go running... even though I want to.
Managing fitness expectations
I was talking to a friend of mine who is a personal trainer and he asked why I don’t I go once a week since that’s better than nothing. But part of me thinks, "What’s the point?!" It’s just once a week. That’s not what I want. I want to go 3 times a week. Because I’m an idiot and competitive with myself. And he pointed out that going for a run once a week is better than nothing, which is true. But then another part of me thinks yes, but only if you go for a longer run, more like 5 miles. 2.2 miles is nothing! And then I start thinking about 5 miles once a week... and then also know that I would be really stupid to do that. Recovering from that would be far worse than a shorter run that I don’t see the point in. I know I know me. I know I would push myself to do that. Just to appease my mind, regardless of what my body tells me.
I know I am completely ridiculous by the way.
How do I stay active but avoid fatigue?
So I don’t know. Do I go for one really short run once a week and accept it as it is? Or do I just keep up the walking and make sure I go for a long walk each weekend day? It’s probably more sensible to go for walks. Time will tell on how sensible I am...
What blood cancer were you diagnosed with?
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