Am I being ghosted or am I over sensitive
Hi. I was diagnosed with CLL in late January. Told family and some friends (some of whom I've known for 35 years) and after initial reactions, didn't hear from these guys for 4-5 months...is that normal? Am I expecting too much? Now they're talking of catching up before Christmas. I really don't feel like it..
as disappointing as I'm sure it feels, I think this happens more often than one might think. Who knows why? My very best friend disappeared for a while when I was first diagnosed. As hurtful as it was, I tried to remember that her mother had died of cancer and maybe she just couldn't deal with the thought??? I still don't know. I'm attaching a great article that may help. I hope you can trust that the right people will show up for you when you need them. We're always here to talk about it if needed. Wishing you the best!
Angie (Team Member)
https://blood-cancer.com/living/people-disappear.Thanks Angie. It is true that as some friends disappear...others have reappeared...I guess it's all part of it. Thank you for the article also. Best wishes best wishes to you too. Keep us posted.
That definitely stinks when that happens. Unfortunately ghosting happens a lot with scenarios like this. I feel like 4-5 months is a long time. I don't think you're being overly sensitive. However, perhaps your loved ones didn't know what to say, maybe they felt they would make you feel upset so didn't say anything. Healthy people don't always understand that silence can be more hurtful. Maybe reach out again and explain how you're feeling? I think that the fact they're wanting to catch up is a good sign though. I hope you can talk it out and feel better about the situation. Warm wishes, Katelynn (Team member)
Thank you for your response Katelynn- I appreciate. I think I'm just going to take my time and see where my thoughts and feelitake me. I wish you well. You're very welcome! I'm glad you're doing what you feel is best for you. 😀 Thank you, you as well!
You need to do what is best for yourself re: reconnecting at Christmas. Unfortunately, it seems to be pretty common when people distance themselves from you after a diagnosis. It happened to me with people I'd known 40 plus years. The up side is that sometimes unexpected people step up to the plate and fill the void. Or, in this case, maybe some of these people needed some time to come to terms with what is going on. In any case, I agree it is a good sign that they've at least expressed interest in reconnecting. Maybe you can ask them what was holding them back (if you are close enough to them) if you decide to reconnect. I hope everything works out well for you. Susan (Team member) 100% true. When I was diagnose some people I thought wouldn’t faded away and some people I thought wouldn’t even care stepped up in a major way. It is weird how that seems to happen to everyone in some form. I found that sometimes it was worth the conversation and sometimes it wasn’t. It depends on the person I suppose but either way, I can say that most people are not alone if they don’t want to be! Keep on keepin’ on, DPM
