A Plan Is In Place

Well, the last few weeks have been pretty horrific really. The dog's owner and I had a major blow out which wasn’t even an argument it just all exploded over a couple of messages and then there was no communication for 10 days and "my dog" was looked after by someone else for a week. So that was really sh*t.

We have a plan!

This alongside all the fertility funding stuff put me in a really bad place, which in a way happened at a really good time because I had a fertility appointment and a session with the fertility counselor, and from this, I have a plan to put into place. It was also nice to speak to the counselor about everything that’s going on as they are completely removed, have no loyalty to me or him so didn’t take sides or give any advice that wasn’t helpful at the moment. The counselor was also really lovely and told me how impressive and inspirational I am which was very nice to hear. The sad thing is that she is no longer working for the hospital so if I want to talk to someone again, it will be someone else, but never mind.

So the plan is in. Chose a sperm donor, which is actually a really weird process to go through. I’ll probably do a separate post on that and go into it in more detail. And it looks like I’ll be choosing an American donor, so my child will have a connection to all the Americans reading this! I’m going to start looking again after Easter as I’ve needed a few weeks off with everything happening about money and getting my head around that. I also need to be in a place where that anger that I have is less about the fact that I could have been doing all of this stuff – speaking to the counselor, choosing a sperm donor, working out money stuff over the winter when I couldn’t have any fertility treatment and got it all sorted for now, if that first consultant had done his job. ARGHHHH!!!

Figuring out how I'm going to pay

Anyway, because regardless of funding, I have to pay for the sperm myself which is fine, I am going to crack on and do this as it will also take around 3 weeks from payment to get it to the hospital which isn’t ideal. So after Easter, I will pay for it and get it to my hospital so my eggs and the sperm are together. I will then decide if I am going to pay for the treatment privately (HELLO CREDIT CARDS), or maybe do a fundraising page so people can donate if they want to. Not sure how I feel about that. Or, fingers crossed the funding comes through. If paying for it myself will really break me, I will move all my fertility care to a different hospital where there is funding, which I really don't want to do. But if I have to move my care then at least I’m all ready to go and hopefully the process will be quick and straightforward and I won't be at the back of a long queue.

The one good thing about doing this all with cancer is that I don’t seem to be at the bottom of the waitlist and everything is actually happening pretty quickly.

The next appointment is with obstetrics so they can talk to me about the hormone regime, how many embryos, and also the impact of my disease on the pregnancy and the child, so that will be FUN.