Elephant Tattoo

Well, I did it! Much to my mother’s dismay...

Me: Mummy, I know you are going to be really angry and disappointed with me, but I’m walking to the tattoo artist to get my elephant tattoo.
Mother: Well Katherine, *heavy sigh*... How old are you?!
Me: 36
Mother: Well exactly. You are an adult, and you can do what you want. Just think when you are 80 and you have wrinkly skin.
Me: *interrupting* I’ll have a wrinkly old elephant!
Mother: Laughs.

THANK GOD!!!! I was just going to put a photo of it when it was done on the family WhatsApp group, but I knew that was mean, as I knew she wouldn’t be happy. My father on the other hand, when I put the photo in the group, replied ‘cool tat, man’. Lolz. And yes, he was in his teens in the 60s. I also phoned to tell my mother because it’s on the inside of my right wrist/forearm and there’s no way in hell I could have hidden it. Also, as she pointed out, I AM a GROWN UP! So I can do what I want. Well, within reason and the law, obviously.

It was meant to be!

I’ve been thinking of getting it for nearly 4 years. When I got my angel wing on my 10th cancerversary, I nearly changed it to an elephant and have wondered over the years if I should have done it. But no. I have written about hope and my angels too many times over the last, nearly 14 years since my diagnosis, to not have my angel wing. And it was important to get it on my 10th cancerversary as well. But the elephant idea has never gone away and I managed to get it done between all the restrictions in London with different tiers and lockdowns, etc. So it was meant to be!

I have always loved elephants and I don’t really know why. They are my spirit animal. My guide. They make me so happy. I just love them. And I have an elephant’s memory. I am an old soul in so many ways. I am strong and I just keep going. So I am like an elephant in so many ways. When I look back at all that I have done alongside my leukaemia diagnosis and the fatigue (which is not great at the moment, roll on the Spring when I can come off treatment), it is quite amazing what I have done. A bit like watching an elephant move heavy things, or lean to do things at a command.

And with the year I’m going to have next year with fertility stuff and probably doing it on my own. I won’t know, probably until the week before I start the treatment... men. Regardless, it’s going to be tough in many ways. Because pregnancy and a baby are never easy. It always comes with its challenges even if you are in a couple, have disposable income, etc etc etc. It’s the hardest thing in the world. But I know that. I’m prepared for that. Well as much as I can be. And now I have my elephant keeping me company, urging me on, not letting me give up or forget.