The Advice We Didn't Ask For

By Racheli Alkobey

Last Updated:

1 min read

In today's video, I share some of the unsolicited advice and comments that were made to me and fellow cancer patients as we began and finished treatment for cancer. Have you received any comments/advice that you weren't asking for? How did it make you feel? Let me know in the comments!

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linjo56 Member

Yes. I wish every day I could erase it from my mind. People should be more careful about what they say.
Ramae Hamrin Member

What a great video, Racheli! We all have had so much unsolicited advice. I've also heard, "Don't eat sugar!" which I generally don't, but I already wasn't before I was told not to. The one that has been hardest to hear is, "Stay positive!" for so many reasons. First, I absolutely know that positivity is good for EVERYTHING in life, not just cancer. Second, it's not going to cure me by itself. Third, it's incredibly dismissive to just say that and do nothing. Love your videos. ❤️ Keep 'em coming!
Yolanda Brunson-Sarrabo Member

Love you 😀 Yes, that good ole advice that some do follow even me, but then I woke up and took control of my own life... while telling those with unsolicited advise to "Kick rocks" !
aseidel Member

When someone ask my family how I am doing, their response is , she is good, just has fatigue. Well that is true but I also have about 10 other negative side effects. They downplay and don't understand what I am going through.
1. Yolanda Brunson-Sarrabo Member
 
 <inline-mention user-id="3651201" username="aseidel"/> That whole statement of "walk a mile in my shoes" is the truth. Only when an individual has gone through this unfortunately can they really grasp the true steps in the abyss. Best!
Ann Harper Member

<inline-mention user-id="3651245" username="Racheli Alkobey"/> this is so true. As a person who likes to give advice, your video is something to keep in mind.
Deb Wesloh Member

Love this! I can definitely relate! I know people think they are helping...but seriously. I remember hearing a lot of similar comments when I was diagnosed; definitely unsolicited. My favorite is "at least you got the good cancer." Best wishes to you.
Ann Harper Member

<inline-mention username="Racheli Alkobey" user-id="3651245"/> I just watched this again and I remember someone saying, 'Are they sure you have cancer?' This is because I downplayed it and was in watch and wait mode. I think that was one of the only times I really got insulted. I love your videos and haven't gotten to see a new one for awhile. I hope you are doing well and I hope you keep the videos coming. Ann (Blood-Cancer.com Team)