The Greatest Year
I have yet to meet someone who said, “2020 was a great year!” And at the tender young age of 77, I can honestly say, I have never experienced a year like this one.
The beginning of a long year
Early on in 2020, COVID-19 turned our lives upside down. We quickly discovered that almost every emotional safety outlet was suddenly off-limits. It was almost impossible to travel or visit family members living out of state. You could not just pick up and go nor was it possibly go out to dinner, visit with friends, or see a show. And who among us wanted to jump on a commercial flight with 100 masked strangers? For the most part, we remained home and ventured out only when the need for groceries or medical appointments was apparent.
Being confined at home also meant learning new interpersonal skills as we adjusted to being confined with equally frustrated family members. We learned via ZOOM that many of our friends questioned the wisdom of scheduling routine medical checkups or announced they had decided to postpone much-needed medical appointments. Sadly, some decided to forgo much-needed treatments. If that were not enough, who among us could escape the never-ending news cycle that reminded us daily of the dangers of social interaction?
My unexpected non-Hodgkin lymphoma diagnosis
Personally, I am dealing with the lingering thoughts of a recently radiated prostate and the potential for rising PSA numbers. Then out of the blue, I suddenly had to deal with an unexpected diagnosis of non-Hodgkin lymphoma. Dealing with the emotional side effects of the diagnosis along with reacting to a cocktail of powerful drugs only served to raise my level of anxiety to new heights. Almost immediately following my first treatment I both lost my sense of taste and discovered I needed to embrace many diet restrictions. Everything I ate tasted like paste except for fruits and vegetables.
I now needed to avoid fresh fruits and vegetables. I learned that the seemingly harmless bacteria that any healthy person could easily tolerate could now easily put my life at risk. My low white blood cell count and compromised immunity due to chemotherapy presented a high risk of infection. I learned that no matter how carefully you wash and prepare fresh food items, the risk of bacterial contamination remains. The same cautions also included yet another warning … stop drinking well water at home. My beverage of choice for the next 5 months was to be distilled bottled water. Throughout the 2020 season of COVID-19, I would often ask myself - what purpose am I serving?
Our voices need to be heard
Over time, I began to realize that regardless of our medical condition, each of us has much to offer. Our opinions, our beliefs, and our voices need to be heard. I discovered that when you reached out to others, they responded in ways I would have never expected. There are those who offered prayers and support. Some turned away, while others came to me seeking information for themselves or for someone, they knew who was also facing cancer.
Little did I know the combination of treatments that began with prostate cancer surgery in 2013 and later hormone therapy and radiation in 2018 would serve as mental preparation for what I was to face in 2020. While I had never undergone chemotherapy in a strange way, I understood this new cancer was simply another challenge to be overcome. I also found it a strange coincidence that it was in 2018 when R-CHOP chemo treatments were officially recognized as a new way to treat non-Hodgkin lymphoma. In many ways, I am on the cutting edge of patient experiences when it comes to R-CHOP and NHL.
A greater sense of hope and strength
Hopefully, my journey with cancer is under control that said none of us can know the future. In a strange way, each round of cancer has given me a greater sense of hope and strength. Rather than viewing cancer as an unconquerable enemy, I now understand that by accepting the fact that you have this disease vs fighting it and by maintaining a positive attitude, your body may just have a better chance of keeping cancer under control.
In 2020, I learned that cancer is not just a physical battle. It is also a mental battle that every patient must come to terms with.
A cancer diagnosis has a way of helping us focus on what is important in life. No matter what stage you are at with cancer… recognize that you have value, that people care about you, and that you have an important mission – to motivate others to be positive and proactive when it comes to battling cancer.
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