Educate You
I guess after a while you learn to adapt to the challenges, trials, and everything that comes along with blood cancer; however, sometimes those rare instances of awkwardness are frustrating. I recall writing how a former coworker compared multiple myeloma to her foot spur. Yes, the oddball commentary people say when they are clueless and or don’t know what to say. Do we give them a pass or educate them? Well, that really depends, I would imagine one would have to think about how they would react if the shoe were on the other foot literally. So how do we educate those who don’t walk our walk, by no fault of their own? Well, let’s start off with some common education.
Extraterrestrial moment
Nothing about blood cancer in 2021 is so off the planet grid to decipher - I look at it as Russian roulette with sudden bad cells running amuck and now they’ve become activated and ready to act up. So when a person informs they have blood cancer or any cancer don’t be dumbfounded as though they have two heads. I know the news may be terrifying, and quite frankly hard to grasp but once the words simmer in adjust your face and move forward with the supporting words we crave and appreciate.
I’m sure many of you delved into learning more about your condition, with the thought the more you learn the more you see what and how you can get through this. I still have a file crate everything multiple myeloma. It’s actually taking up space for some new shoes that can now go in their place. I’ve done the tiresome work of learning and comprehending, it doesn’t totally explain a whole bunch like the full technicalities of myeloma, but it was enough to make me feel like I was doing something in educating myself. Well, that same energy should be followed for those that may not understand your new walk, learn about it, or better yet ask sensible questions. There’s nothing more satisfying than learning about new things. It allows you to keep your brain sharp while pivoting in showing your support.
Curve those words
Now, I realize the person from the latter meant no ill intent, but give me a break. If someone is telling you they may die, do we then say I know your pain as I have this splinter that needs fixing? Curve your words is simply thinking before you speak, a minuscule second in holding your tongue and understanding what this person is telling you in real-time... “They Have Cancer.” It doesn’t matter if you have a relatable story at that moment because at this moment it’s all about listening first, absorb, and then reply.
Lastly, I wanted to shed a light on karma and address how you should watch how you approach these sensitive conversations because we know what karma can be. I’m sure many faced with cancer are in agreement as we don’t wish this on our worst enemy, with that said your words and how they affect those affected mean a lot. The thought of what if I was in your boat?" "How would I react?" "What would I do?"
Taking the time to explore and understand is a beautiful thing.
The time to fight is now, with integrity, grace, hope, and a smile….when you feel like it
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