Look Good, Feel Better!

My mother and I were eating lunch at Taco Bell recently when a young lady approached us and said, "Hi, ladies. I need to buy some clothes for my great-aunt.  I was wondering where older ladies shop." I felt like throwing my taco at her, but she added, " You all look so nice!" Okay, she gave us a backward compliment. It is what it is.  Mother turns 91 this year and I just turned 64, so in her twenty-something world . . . we are ancient, but she thinks we look nice anyway.

Looking good when feeling fatigued with MDS

I remember my mother telling me when I was in elementary school, "When you look good, you feel good, then you'll do well." Mother preached pride in your appearance means pride in your work.  I try to remember this lesson on the days when myelodysplastic syndromes (MDS) drains my energy.

In my first year of teaching in 1978, my mentor was Lynelle. I was 22 years old and right out of college; Lynelle was only 25 herself. Not only was Lynelle an excellent teacher but also attractive and stylish. Fast forward 42 years and it turns out that we both have blood cancer! Lynelle is going through chemo for multiple myeloma. How does Lynelle look these days? She hasn't slipped a bit!

Bonding with an old friend over blood cancer

I asked Lynelle about her habits. "I get up every morning and shower, then I dress in something that makes me feel good. I add jewelry and usually a scarf. I go out if only to run an errand," Lynelle said. She walks for exercise. Leggings have been practical because of her weight loss during chemo. Lynelle makes a plan every day, which doesn't surprise me. We were both special education teachers who wrote hundreds of goal sheets for our students. Now, we have a shared goal to survive blood cancer.

Elizabeth, my friend from church, missed several Sundays.  Her home health care nurse told her, "Get yourself to church!" The nurse explained that you'll feel better getting cleaned up and dressed up. "Set your alarm earlier, so you'll have plenty of time to shower, dress and groom yourself. Do not go back to bed!" said the nurse. It's an effort for Elizabeth, but she does it now. She feels better getting out among people.

Adjusting my style and goals for cancer

I love to look at old photographs. It's fun to see how people used to dress. I have a photo of my grandmother in the 1950s wearing a hat to board an airplane. I understand that each generation has ideas on style and what looks good. Sometimes we need to adjust our style for cancer.

When I wake up, dress up and show up, I feel better. Some days, I just want to take a nap, but I try to accomplish something every day. I like to cross off things on my to-do list. Progress, not perfection, just doing the best I can while trying to look the best I can. Its all part of self-care.