What To Do When You Can't Be There

Last updated: November 2021

Unfortunately, a few people in my family have had cancer. Because of this, I always wonder what I can do to make it easier on them. I can’t always be there, but I have still found ways to help support them. Cancer is tough and it affects the person’s body, mind, and spirit. As caregivers, of course, we want to be there to help as often as we can, but when we can’t, there are still things we can do to offer support.

Below are 5 more tips I found. I hope you find them useful.

A white noise machine may help

Gift them a white noise machine. Sleep is sometimes difficult for people going through treatments or worried because they just learned they have cancer. Having a machine that makes sounds of the rain, or wind, or some other comforting noise may help them to relax and get some much-needed sleep.

It also offers a soothing atmosphere that might help people to meditate or use visualization. It may even offer a background noise for someone doing yoga.

An aide may help

When you can’t be there - an aide may help. There are different agencies out there that offer respite care. They are especially helpful if you have to work or can’t be there for other reasons. Depending on your insurance, they may even be free or partially covered. If you are concerned with the quality of care your loved one is receiving, have a monitor in place.

Having help and a way to be sure the proper care is given will be a relief to your mind and will allow the person you care about to get the care they need.

Build an inlaw suite or add a tiny home

Depending on your means, adding on additional space may help you to be closer to your loved one and give them the care they need. This is expensive, and not for everyone, but if it’s possible you will have your family member or good friend right there with you. This will allow you to be there as often as you can and be sure they are taken care of properly.

Look for a community connection page

There are many things that go on in our communities that we may not even know about. Facebook is one way to find out about these communities, but you can also ask at the community center in your town.

There may be support programs for you or your loved one that would help to make the situation a bit easier to deal with. If you are able to find support groups in your area it will help you and your loved one to talk about experiences others in the group understand and can help with. It may also offer some stress relief. It never hurts to ask, and you may be happy with what you find.

Church support

Church offers a place to pray, a place to listen to motivational talks, a place to meet others (some have an after church meet-up), and a place to make peace with God (or whomever you worship). Look into the churches in your area and offer a ride if your loved one is interested in going. If you can find the time to go with them, it would mean even more.

The best thing anyone can do is to be there in person. No one wants to go through this alone. The next best thing is to call, but there are so many other things you can do as a caregiver to help support and show love to a person going through cancer. Many of them only take a little time, but the appreciation will last a lifetime.

Wishing you health & happiness.

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